Bhinneka News Online: Deepak Chopra: How to make your marriage ‘thrive forever’

Friday, May 5, 2023

CNBC Make It Life helps you lead a healthier, richer and more fulfilling lifestyle.
By Aditi Shrikant

This is the secret to a long, healthy marriage, says Deepak Chopra

Deepak Chopra's expertise spans a wide range of topics including mediation, nutrition, mindfulness and, now, psychedelics.

The bestselling author, 76, also has some acute insights on marriage. After all, he has been in one for more than 50 years.

"I have only one tip for healthy, long-term relationships," he says. "Ask yourself, 'Do I want to be happy or do I want to be right?' Give up being right and your relationship will thrive forever."

When you're spending time with someone, he says, you give them your full attention. "My advice to young people in any relationship, whether it's personal, romantic, with your parents or professional, is, be present," he says. "That's it."

We Tried It: Waking up at 5 a.m. for one week

I'm someone who sleeps until noon most weekends, so it was very out of character for me to volunteer for my most bizarre challenge yet: waking up at 5 a.m. for seven days.

We're often told that the most successful people wake up super early in the morning to get things done. What I really wanted to learn from this exercise was if waking up earlier than I usually do would help me be more productive.

Instead of my usual 6:45 a.m. wake-up time on in-office days, or 8:30 a.m. on work-from-home days, I set my alarm for 5 each morning for a week.

Getting up earlier had its benefits, like having time to go to the gym before work. I also had more energy throughout the day. There were downsides, though, like rushed evenings and being in bed before 9:30 p.m.

I'd say the pros outweigh the cons. Even though I've gone back to my usual wake-up time in the last three months, perhaps I'll start incorporating some 5 a.m. days into my schedule soon.

— Renée Onque, health and wellness reporter

How To Talk To People: Toxic phrases highly narcissistic people use

The world is full of difficult personalities, but one that's impossible to avoid is the narcissist.

As a psychologist who studies narcissism, Ramani Durvasula has found that, in most cases, highly narcissistic people are masters of gaslighting. Their primary goal in a relationship is to offset their insecurity by controlling and manipulating others.

Here are three phrases narcissists always use — and how to deal with them:

"I don't want to make this about me but … ": This shows that a narcissistic person knows they shouldn't dominate a conversation, and they are going to do it anyway. The best way to handle this is to sit back and let them talk. If it's interesting, listen, but give up hope that this will be a two-way conversation.
"I'm sorry you feel that way": Because narcissists have a hard time admitting fault, this is the closest they may ever get to an apology. If you encounter this phrase, Durvasula's advice is to simply disengage.
"Why are you doing this to me?": Narcissists are masters of shifting blame. If a struggle you're having inconveniences them, they will frame the situation so that they are the victim. To cope, you can remind yourself that you are not the problem.

Speed Read: DASH eating plan is the No. 1 diet for heart health

The American Heart Association evaluated the 10 most popular diets and ranked them based on which eating patterns best promote heart health.

The Dietary Approaches to Stop Hypertension, or DASH, eating plan received a perfect score, while a vegan diet received a solid 78 out of 100 and a ketogenic diet received a dismal 31 out of 100.

DASH "is low in salt, added sugar, tropical oil, alcohol and processed foods and high in non-starchy vegetables, fruits, whole grains and legumes," the AHA said in its statement.

Here are the basics of the DASH eating plan:

Eat these foods often: